OUR SEXUALITY: SEXUAL ORIENTATION. HOMOPHOBIA
Sexual Orientation.
Sexual orientation refers to the gender to which a person is physically and emotionally attracted. Someone who is sexually attracted to people of the other gender is called heterosexual or straight. People who are attracted to others of their own gender are called homosexual or gay. Gay women are also called lesbians. Those who are attracted to people of both genders are called bisexual.
Each person’s sexual orientation is more complex than these simple labels—humans are all different, and each individual’s sexual orientation is unique. Each of us is at a different place somewhere along the range between exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual orientations.
Many people wonder what causes their sexual orientation. While there is strong evidence pointing toward biological factors, this remains a subject of great debate among scientists and politicians alike. Regardless of the cause, whether people are straight, gay, or bisexual is usually established before puberty and before they begin having sex. And although sexual orientation may begin to develop before birth, it may shift in the course of a lifetime. But sexual orientation is not something that people can decide for themselves or for others. In other words, being physically and emotionally attracted to people of a certain gender is not a conscious choice.
Homophobia
In our society, there is a tremendous amount of fear and hatred of people who are gay, lesbian, or bisexual. This fear is called homophobia. Homophobia is caused by ignorance, or misinformation and lack of understanding about what gay, lesbian, and bisexual people are really like.
Instead of learning about and respecting people of diverse sexual orientations, many people simply believe myths that gay people are dangerous, sick, evil, sinful, weird, disgusting, and perverted. But these are not truths; they are stereotypes. A stereotype is a generalization about an entire group of people based on the actions of a few individual members of that group. Just as it is wrong to draw conclusions about all straight people because of a few examples, making generalizations about all gay people is very harmful. For example, one stereotype of gay men is that they will harm or molest children in sexual ways. As a result, many gay people who tell the truth about their sexual orientation are fired from jobs as teachers and camp counselors. In reality, however, the majority of people who sexually abuse children are heterosexual.
All too often, homophobia prevents people from getting to know gay people as individuals and as friends, so they never learn the truth and rid themselves of these harmful stereotypes.
Homophobia also makes many people worry about their own sexual orientation and the sexual orientation of their children. For example, some people believe that sexual orientation is formed by early childhood experiences. Therefore, many parents worry about sex play between children of the same gender. However, it’s very common for young children to look at and touch the sex organs of friends of both genders. It is simply one of the ways in which they learn about physical similarities and differences. This kind of sex play does not make a child straight, gay, or bisexual.
Many people also worry that having an occasional sexual fantasy about someone of the same gender may mean that they are gay. In reality, people of all ages and sexual orientations may have sexy dreams and fantasies about either gender. Dreams and fantasies don’t mean that someone is straight, gay, or bisexual.
Because of homophobia, children who realize that they are strongly attracted to people of the same gender often react with fear, confusion, and self-hatred. They absorb their culture’s homophobia at very young ages. That’s why most gay, lesbian, and bisexual teenagers spend these years feeling depressed and isolated, thinking they have no one to talk with who will understand and accept their feelings.
Parents and friends can play an especially important role in reassuring gay, lesbian, and bisexual people that their feelings are healthy, normal, and natural. We all have a better chance of being able to enjoy our sexuality if we fight against homophobia.
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